Someday Maybe Someday

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On the day of my diagnosis there was
A high school shooting on the news
I sat helpless in the waiting room
Someday, maybe someday,
No-one will understand the phrase
High school shooting
Someday, maybe someday

I'm cutting the tags
From the necks of my shirts
To lay neatly and deep in a garden
Oh my finger, my thumb
Oh this scent of the dirt
Take my heart

On the first day of treatment a ferry upturned
I sat dry mouthed in the waiting room
Row boats and flash lights in the gloom
We could only do what we could do
The local fisher people say
Straight down the camera
Then the camera cut away

I'm cutting the tags
From the necks of my shirts
To lay neatly and deep in a garden
Oh my finger, my thumb
Oh this scent of the dirt
Take my heart

Did I live well? Who knows?
I loved for a moment
Just long enough to grieve
I have sat in the presence of
The light behind the leaves
The sum of my achievements
And it's good enough for me

On the day of my diagnosis there was
A high school shooting on the news
I sat helpless in the waiting room
Someday, maybe someday,
No-one will understand the phrase
High school shooting
Someday, maybe someday

I'm cutting the tags
From the necks of my shirts
To lay neatly and deep in a garden
Oh my finger, my thumb
Oh this scent of the dirt
Take my heart

~ Brendan Bonsack 2021



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