Porch Light

The double halo porch light squints
At the morning like
A glow worm fighting sleep

I know you came over last night
Perhaps I didn't hear the bell
Or you decided not to ring it

But the air was steeped
But the air was steeped
But the air was steeped
This morning
In the old world

I still have your favourite cup
I conjured up a brew
Rallied of bergamot and you

Like a retired famulus
I raise a sunny smile in thought of all
The places you sawed me in two

And the air was steeped
And the air was steeped
And the air was steeped
This morning
In the old world

I found a younger breath
fresh as the year that I thought
I had lost it

The double halo porch light squints
At the morning like
A glow worm fighting sleep

But the air was steeped
But the air was steeped
But the air was steeped
This morning
In the old world

~ Brendan Bonsack

Three Horn Face

My second favourite dinosaur
That I think about a lot
Calms me when I’m wired
Is the triceratops

Eight hundred teeth
And the size of this bus
Winding through the suburbs
Always late, but never lost
Always late, but never lost

You poke your head above
The end of the world
And they call you horn face
Horn face
Three horn face

And my favourite dinosaur is the one they haven't found
Still quiet in the ground somewhere and there's such a lot of ground

They had music, but not as we know it
Music, but not as we know it
Music, but not as we know it
They laughed and loved and danced
But not as we know it, to the last
Put it in a stone and tell about it

My second favourite dinosaur
I still have the plastic toy
Saved it from a fire once
It knew me as a boy

I saw it in a movie then
A blunt and angry beast
Up against a T-Rex
And I had to watch it bleed
Had to watch it bleed

You poke your head above
The end of the world
And they call you horn face
Horn face
Three horn face

And my favourite dinosaur is the one they haven't found
Still quiet in the ground somewhere and there's such a lot of ground

They had music, but not as we know it
Music, but not as we know it
Music, but not as we know it
They laughed and loved and danced
But not as we know it, to the last
Turn yourself to stone and tell about it

~ Brendan Bonsack

Tide

I don't worry about my sadness
I know that it comes from love
There's a dreamy kind of drowning
You have left deep in my shell

And I know
You can't hear me
You can't see me
I can't simply come around
But I know
Time's an ocean
It weighs nothing
Till you're out there inside
And I know
The world is better now
For it having rolled we two
In the tide

But I worry about your sadness
It attends me in my dreams
A thumbnail moon over a darkness
Nowhere do land and water meet

And I know
You can't hear me
You can't see me
I can't simply come around
But I know
Time's an ocean
It weighs nothing
Till you're out there inside
And I know
The world is better now
For it having rolled we two
In the tide

~ Brendan Bonsack

Tracing

I am seven, transfixed
By the picture book scene
Of dinosaurs grazing
In a Mesozoic mist

Their round backs
Lined with the teeth
We loosed and left overnight
In the hope of silver

The trees of vivid green
Burlap trunks rising
To a canopy sprawled
Neat as nana’s knitting

There’s an ad break
And I am asking
Was she scared
Waking next to him

Poppa, in the grey room
Room of pipes, dusty shoes
Poppa, in the room
Where he died?

The laminate table
Smooth and cool
My school pencils
In a ragged pile

Yes, very scared
She is saying
Holding the corners of
My greaseproof paper

I am seven, transfixed
By the picture book mist
Traveling wet and slow
Between trees

The fauna and forest
My trusty sharp 2B
Is faithful easy
To their edges, but

Oh, the patience of nana
Tearing new sheets
Of grease proof paper
Throughout the night

Just how do you trace a fog?

~ Brendan Bonsack

Stegosaurus

So much is missing
From that time
The curtains were beige
Or maybe they were white
Somebody was leaving
Somebody arrived
To the roar of a racing heart

I love you
I can see you
It’s not your fault
I love you
I can see you
It’s not your fault

So much is missing
From that time
There was TV in the long room
Or was it the radio on?
Spark lights across the wire door
The floor drums, spoon on the edge
Of a cold soup bowl
A coat on a mirror
Dust on the mirror, rain on the coat in the dust
On the mirror
Your cheddar pressed and laid in the trap voice
Never ever sprung

I love you
I can see you
It’s not your fault
I love you
I can see you
It’s not your fault

So much is missing
From that time
Stegosaurus, Brontosaurus
And the ones that could fly
Hanging by a fishing line
Double-knot on double-knot
The sitcom laughter swell
The eraser pencil’s anger at
The impossible algebra
The don't tell
Don't tell
Don't tell

I love you
I can see you
It’s not your fault
I love you
I can see you
It’s not your fault

~ Brendan Bonsack

Old Lovers Lane

To get to old Lovers Lane
I went the back way
Through the orchard
Burned at summertime
Flailed and charred
Against the grey

Where the wattle was, remember
We climbed at night those days
And yellow dusted
Glowed so after

I wanted to hold you again
To feel your hair in my face
I wanted to hear me say your name
The way the birds proclaim
Their joy at making morning

To get to old Lovers Lane
I went the back way
Above the armory of rooftops
Two fences clung by chain

Hoodies, strollers, pacifiers
Brand new teeth are coming in
It's biting weather
He doesn't answer

I wanted to hold you again
To feel your hair in my face
I wanted to hear me say your name
The way the birds proclaim
Their joy at making morning

To get to old Lovers Lane
I went the back way
Where bouquets
Sprouted from the trees
At the gravel and bend
After Saturdays

Before the bridge into the pines
Their deathly tender hush
Go any further
Get lost forever

I wanted to hold you again
To feel your hair in my face
I wanted to hear me say your name
The way the birds proclaim
Their joy at making morning

~ Brendan Bonsack

Election Night Nana

Nana says, Nana says
We vote for our abusers
Because it feels familiar
Because it feels like
They won't do it this time

Nana hurls, Nana hurls
A shoe at the television
What about the kids?
Talk about doom a generation!
We are running out of time

Ooh, look at them there
In blood stepped so far, and
Reloading their thoughts and prayers

Nana shouts, Nana shouts
Wipe the smug off your faces
What about your prisons?
What about the stolen generations?
Will nothing ever change?

Ooh, just look at them there
In blood stepped so far, and
Reloading their thoughts and prayers

Nana paces, Nana paces
The people in this country!
A nation of stupid
Think more about the football
Than they do about the future!
I came here with nothing
But a suitcase and nightmares
The people get to sleep here
But no-one dares to dream

Nana says, Nana says
We vote for our abusers
The lines on the graph
And those shapes on the map
Are all our secret traumas
There's always four year's time

Ooh, just look at them there
In blood stepped so far, and
Reloading their thoughts and prayers

~ Brendan Bonsack

Light Pollution

There were more stars
In my childhood skies
Granddad would say that
Each was where the dead went

Pointing out his sister there
At the tip of a work-worn hand
I started to count, but I
Quickly ran out of names

And I think that I cried
For losing my place in the sky
But his soft old jacket embraced me

When you move to the city
You won’t see so many, he said
But they will all still know
All still know that you are there

Granddad, are some of them the dinosaurs?
Granddad, then what's a shooting star?
When you're dead so long do you get tired
And want to come back down?

And I think that I cried
For losing my place in the sky
And he lifted his pipe and he told me
That, I don't know

There were more stars
In my childhood skies
I loved Granddad's story
Much more than the science

I think that I cried
For losing my place in the sky
And his soft old jacket embraced me

~ Brendan Bonsack